Wednesday, 15 July 2009

Britain's Loser Culture - Part 3: denial that the British are losers

What I said to the male friend who did not want to be tarred with the same brush as my other male friends whom I did not think could easily produce a bird and a bottle.

Thank you for your suggestion, but it seems a bit of an imposition to ask single male friends to bring a bottle and a bird when I already know they are in difficulties getting hold of the latter. I suppose this means I must concentrate on making more female friends so that I lead a more gender-balanced life.

He responded:

I think you make your single male friends sound like a bunch of losers.

I would not - I would have you know - find any difficulty finding a female companion to take to an event, provided there was a certain amount of notice.

You are making a mistake if you assume that I belong to a group of men that cannot find women.

Perhaps you did not mean me, but it is possible that you do.



I then said to him:

I would not like it if I received an invitation to a party asking me to bring a male partner, whether or not I think I can produce one or not, at short notice or not!

I would like to think that the host or hostess would have enough friends of his or her own to complete the guest list without asking for help, and that my company in itself would be sufficient.

Please do not think I think that you in particular are a bit of a loser.

Frankly, I feel a bit of a loser and that my friends - male and female - are a bunch of losers. The whole thing started as a whinge about the quality of my female friends, remember?

It was going to develop into a rant about being in a country where everybody is a bit of a loser, because this country has a bit of loser culture about it, but I think I had better drop the subject now!

And then he said:

I am aware that the thread began as a rant about your female friends. It is rather surprising that you cannot seem to persuade any of them to come. I wonder why not.

I was only suggesting that you invite people to 'bring a friend/guest' if they wanted to just to increase the range of people a bit and maybe correct the gender imbalance.

Then you could have canvassed people beforehand just to ask whom they intended to bring, if anyone.

In reality I doubt whether the men present would start quarrelling in the act of vying for your attentions, although you do imply this happened once in the past.

Ideally of course, as you say, guests at a party should all consist of the host or hostess's friends. From this would derive the charm and creativity of choosing a set of guests.

I completely fail to take the point about this country's loser culture. If you or I are in fact losers this is our own responsibility and no-one else's.

Personally I do not see myself in this way - even if you do.

No comments: