The effect of divorce on men

This is a letter I have received from a men's rights campaigner.

Comments welcome.

My name is Peter van de Voorde from Australian radio program


I understand you would like to find out more about fathers' groups.

I am a little curious as to which fathers groups you are referring to when you refer to them as "odd"? [My email to a men's rights contact explained that I wanted to form an opinion about how they are and what they do. "I know they are perceived to be quite odd", I said, "so I would like to see for myself."]

With a little searching, you will note that almost every fathers group in the world, fits into your "angry fathers group" category. Why is this so, you might ask? The answer is very simple.

With few exceptions, they are responsible fathers who strongly resist the forcible removal of their children from their love, care and protection, by State sponsored agencies, institutions and bureaucracies against their will. Most have not only lost their children, but also their homes and are emotionally and economically ruined by the experience.

They are not just angry, they are absolutely outraged and wouldn't be human if they weren't. Not if/but when the community finally learns of the horrific ramifications of these Government sponsored human rights abuses, they will be horrified and heads will certainly roll.

However it will be too late for the many millions of helpless children and their non-custodial parents around the world, whose lives have been destroyed by the current draconian family laws, which belong to the Orwellian State.

If these atrocities were committed against any other minority group, there would be a universal outcry, yet we hear very little from those that are in a position of power, to bring relief to the victims. A multi-million dollar industry flourishes unchallenged, while our communities bleed and are torn apart.

I have yet to find one responsible person, who has had their children forcibly removed from their care, speak out against shared parenting.

Yet I have found many who have never had this traumatic experience forced upon them, yet are ready to join in and espouse the diatribe against fathers and shared parenting. With a little searching however, you will find that most of those that engage in persecuting these unfortunate fathers and their children, have/or are in fact profiteering from the human misery they are inflicting.

What they fail to realize is the fact that these persecuted and stereo typed fathers, have mothers, sisters, daughters, and many new partners who are also horrified at what is happening to their loved ones. Many are starting to speak out in support, and it is no longer a question of if/ but when the tide will turn.

Shoulder to shoulder they stand in defense of their human rights and those of their children. History will see them as heroes not as "deadbeats". Against all the odds they have shown remarkable bravery, great courage and strength of character.

This is in sharp contrast to their persecutors who, motivated by greed, power and malice, think nothing of abusing the human rights of other members of the human family.

Separated fathers are caught between a rock and a hard place when they are denied contact with their children:

If they stand and fight for their human rights, they are labeled as an Angry, Abusive, and Dangerous Thug, not worthy of contact with his children.

If they walk away they are labeled, as an Uncaring, Deadbeat who Abandoned his kids, and is therefore not worthy of contact with his children.

The worse human rights abuses in history were all once legal, the one currently waged against fathers is no exception.

Fathers are not odd, it is the distorted community perceptions that are odd.

I hope this information is of some help in clarifying the position that modern day fathers unfortunately find themselves in.

Peter van de Voorde

Presenter, Reseacher and Co-producer
+61 4286 48691
Singer, Songwriter

25 January 2009


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