Dear Reader

What do you think might be the problem(s) with you/men/women that might prevent you from being in a long-term relationship?

  1. I can't trust them.
  2. They don't trust me.
  3. I don't understand them.
  4. They don't understand me.
  5. I don't know what I want.
  6. They don't know what they want.
  7. I am easily bored.
  8. They are easily bored.
  9. I have no money.
  10. They have no money.
  11. I am not conventionally attractive.
  12. I lack the ability or will to be pleasant, reliable and appreciated as a partner.
  13. I have a drink/drug/gambling addiction problem.
  14. They have a drink/drug/gambling addiction problem.
  15. I am a poor judge of character
  16. I can't seem to get them to do what I want or be what I want them to be.
  17. They are OK at the beginning and then start to go wrong.
  18. I lack self-esteem and tend to take whatever I can find, ie a low-quality partner. In other words, I am a victim of my own low standards.
  19. It is impossible getting them to love me and my pet(s) as I am neither fabulously wealthy nor unusually generous.
  20. I have fussy dietary requirements.
  21. I am possessive.
  22. I am violent.
  23. I have a bad temper.
  24. My children who live with me are brats and I refuse to accept any criticism of them or my parenting ability.
  25. People are just too fussy.
  26. I just can't seem to find someone I like, respect and trust enough.
  27. I just can't seem to find someone I like, respect and trust to contemplate a long-term relationship with me.
  28. Women think I'm a loser.
  29. Men think I'm a dog.
  30. I don't know and don't care.
  31. Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?
  32. I am carrying a torch for my ex.
  33. Potential partners are intimidated by my good looks, wealth, talent and charm.
  34. I am selfish, self-centred, arrogant and domineering.
  35. I am shy, ie fear rejection so much I do not have the courage to ask any woman I find attractive for a date.
  36. I have given up really.
  37. I hate sex.
  38. I hate people.
  39. I hate myself.
  40. Who would want me anyway?
  41. I am too set in my ways to change for anyone.
  42. I don't need anyone.
  43. I don't really like men/women.
  44. I am happier single. Yes, really.
  45. I would be better off on my own than settling for a wimp/loser/slag/crazy lady etc.
  46. OTHER (Please specify by leaving your comments/suggestions/insights. Yes, you, dear Reader!)


Jeff Marshall said…
I fail to see why anyone would want to be anything other than single.

Surely the aim of life is to please oneself and get through it all with the minimum of hassle.

By all means, have a 'special friend' or two.

As for living together, it's best if you hang on to your place and that they keep theirs.

Of course you might maintain a spare toothbrush at their place - and perhaps, if you're lucky, they will keep one at yours.

But don't try living together, whatever you do.
Andromeda said…
Now is the time to ask if you have heard of the Kantian concept of universalisability!

I used to have that philosophy of yours: to live as pleasurably as possible with the minimum of hassle.

No! It is to fulfil one's potential and attempt difficult things you want to do, especially the stuff that people say can't be done.

If you can't think of anything like that to do, then you have children, in the hope that they will succeed in fulfilling your potential, even if you yourself don't.

The human race would die out if we all stayed single and lived alone!

Marriage in the old days was contracted for economic reasons. No one mooned about finding a "soulmate". "Helpmeet" was more a lot more do-able. Marriage as a result worked much better and gender relations were in fact more civilised. The concept of gallantry existed. The Asians with their arranged marriages get something like that.

Happily single people remain single because they have not found anyone they would like to share a home with.

Fair enough, but I am trying to develop a concept of a Domestic Partnership - more than lodger or a housemate, but less than a romantic partner - with whom sex is optional.

It is designed for people who have given up finding romance but wish to share their homes (which may have a spare room or two) with someone more than a lodger but less than a romantic partner.

It is designed particularly for women who have given up on romance but who are not about to get themselves a dog, or do not see why they have to become intimate with a man simply to attract his attention and dull his reason (or consider doing the same to another lady).

This is not to say that intimate relations cannot be initiated subsequently, only that it must NEVER be a condition of the contract.

It is another one of those things I have been told cannot be done.

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